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I am here to unleash a brand new Concept, a new kind of blogging experience - Dating Naked Online. A sure fire way to be controversial, edgy and in the know. A male and female must read a long time in the making. I am a former myspazz BLAHH-GERRR... Aspiring to take my writing to new heights. I guess you can call it the mile high club of writing so to speak. I could lie to you and tell you it's all about romance and fun and the L word, la la, loove... but it's not. It has elements of all of the above, but in the middle, the stuff most people leave out will be explored for your reading horror. There will be elements of my reality, past and present. I call it my reality column... a recurring narrative you can follow week by week. Dating Naked is the name... Dating in all its forms, is the topic. Naked in how I strip it all down to its raw naked form for your reading pleasure. I promise, you will read nothing like it. Subscribe now.


Monday, February 1, 2010

To Friend, or to Boyfriend?

Hey Basil - What do you do if your boyfriend hates all your friends, and your friends hate your boyfriend? What do you do in that situation? Feels like a lose/lose situation if you ask me? Thanks, Marissa

Basil - Well, it is a situation, but to me...an easy one to figure out. This is a classic tug-of-war over loyalty. The boyfriend wants to know if it's all about him, or if you are tied to your friend's opinions. And your friends see someone who is different and who wants you to pull away from them. In both cases, they are both selfish in what they are doing. Maybe your friends like the ex, and have hopes you will return to that person. And the boyfriend, knows he is the outsider, and could give a rat's ass, because he knows he can't change their feelings. The question remains, is he really making you happy?

If he is, and you are not ignoring the issue of "sometimes love just blinds you" until something happens and you then see what everyone was talking about the whole time. If that's not the case, then you need to have a sit down with the friends. And ask them to be fair, and let you and your relationship grow, without the tug of war or guilt of being with him. On the flip side, maybe if the boyfriend cared, he would make an effort to show them that he is the right person for you. They don't have to love each other, just co-exist. And maybe, just maybe...mutual respect will evolve.

I trust all my friends' judgment because they know me better than anyone. Above all though, it's my decision. A decision I will have to live with, and whether or not it's the wrong one, better make the wrong decision yourself, than to look back knowing someone else made the wrong one for you. That's what being an adult is about. If it's your really good friend that knows you and he or she has a legitimate reason for not liking him, you should question that and really look into it. But that's it. They are there to advise you, not make choices for you. A "REAL" friend, will know that.

The NAKED truth
Basil, Dating Naked