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I am here to unleash a brand new Concept, a new kind of blogging experience - Dating Naked Online. A sure fire way to be controversial, edgy and in the know. A male and female must read a long time in the making. I am a former myspazz BLAHH-GERRR... Aspiring to take my writing to new heights. I guess you can call it the mile high club of writing so to speak. I could lie to you and tell you it's all about romance and fun and the L word, la la, loove... but it's not. It has elements of all of the above, but in the middle, the stuff most people leave out will be explored for your reading horror. There will be elements of my reality, past and present. I call it my reality column... a recurring narrative you can follow week by week. Dating Naked is the name... Dating in all its forms, is the topic. Naked in how I strip it all down to its raw naked form for your reading pleasure. I promise, you will read nothing like it. Subscribe now.


Tuesday, December 1, 2009

Once a Cheater, Always a Cheater, blah, blah, BLAH!

Do you think that's true, or are you bitter and need to tell yourself that because you don't have any other answers?

Let me be the first to give you the NAKED truth...Yes, he or she cheated. They betrayed a trust and now, you are a bitter little pill about the whole thing. But let's not become a cliche', and start ranting about cheaters, and how "Once a cheater, always a cheater". Sure, be angry...but you are missing the glaring fact, that he or she, wasn't it for you, or they wouldn't have. They did you a favor, because, do you really want to be with someone who cheats first, breaks up later?
I know, I know...You want answers, why do people cheat?

Well, there is not just one reason...depends on the sex. No, not sex lives, although, that is one of the reasons people cheat, they are not getting laid. But what I meant was the sex, male or female. Men, tend to cheat for very different reasons. Men are simple creatures...there is no mystery to the sex, although to women...we as men, are a science they have yet to master. That is true, because you have yet to learn to think like us, and not a woman. It just might be dangerous for you to even do so. But men cheat for the simplest reasons you could ever imagine. Why?

They just couldn't say no!!!

It's the truth...men just can't turn away the opportunity. Most guys have only heard about the sex lives their friends have had, or what they see on TV. For men, it's almost an urban legend. The hot new girl at work, she only fucks the boss...right? Or, the girl on the business trip...that doesn't really happen? Auhh, but it does, and until men are faced with the opportunity...they are not lying when they say they wouldn't cheat. You will hear men deny it, even catch attitude when generalized about being a dog, like every other guy. But what's he supposed to say?

Yeah, honey...I do love you, but, I am only as faithful as my options?

No, he's not going to say that, he is going to make you feel as secure about his commitment to you as he possibly can...because he doesn't know the future any more than you do. You might be married til death do you part, or until some other girl's legs part. I get the feeling sometimes, women think it was a plot from day one. Lure them in, give the woman a false sense of security, then bring in the new babes. For guys who cheat on their wives, it was as much a surprise to the guy, as it was to the wife. I think women give men too much credit a lot of the time. We really aren't that clever, not that some men aren't. Some are masters of the game. But really, men are as stupid as we are when we leave the porno in the DVD player..."I don't know how that got there?"

Men are always going to be weak to women with amazing bodies and a sexual appetite that she can verbalize. Men, just can't say no, not all men...there is a very very small number of guys who make a commitment, and won't budge. But even they have a weakness, a weakness I would love to put to the test, when they have no idea they are being tested...watch them fall under the pressure. I know that's mean, but I just always have to be right...and I know I am. <---my reality TV show idea... lol

It's my version of Punk'd...call it, Bust'd. Right when the guy is about to cheat, the wife jumps out and screams, BUST'ed...that's when I come out like Ashton, right behind her. lol

For most guys, it's not a matter of being faithful, but a matter of how many options they have. Look at a rockstar, or a rap artist...actors. They all have options, and that's why they move from commitment to commitment. Brad had Jennifer, did a movie with Angelina...Marriage over. Look at Jon and Kate, plus eight. The guy suddenly got a little bit of fame, and he was dipping it in every option he could, plus the nanny.

If you ask some women, that's because they are dogs...pigs and whatever name you can think of as an insult. But that's anger talking...bitterness that you weren't enough...weren't enough to turn away the options. It is a hard pill to swallow, but sometimes, we are just not enough, doesn't matter how hard you try.

It's not just about options, it's about staying young, by changing what's old around you.
Other men cheat, well...because the wife got old...physically, and mentally. She is nothing like the girl he married...she dresses differently...wears her hair differently. She is insecure about her own immortality. Maybe a little bitchy. Simply put, guy meets a girl, who reminds him of the wife he use to be in love with, and in lust with. Love loses its luster, when the lust fades...don't lose sight of that very important fact.

On the flip side, women cheat for more complicated reasons.

For women...this is where it gets tricky. Young girls cheat, because well, they are young and probably shouldn't be in a relationship. I tell my younger cousins all the time, from 17 to 25, be single...screw being in a relationship, they just hold you down. From school, from life, from friends. From going places. I see it all the time, kids trying to be adults when they have no business doing so. But that's because society confuses them. Young people want to get laid, just like everyone else. But society dictates that you should be in a commiment, that commitment sex is better...religion tells us to wait till we are married. You have teens, having babies and getting married, before they even know what they are getting into. So of course you are going to heve a break down in relationships, and when it breaks down, wolves like myself, sneak in the back door. Age is the major reason cheating exists.

Wrong guy, wrong time.

Sometimes, it's as simple as being with the wrong guy, yet not wanting to be alone. And then someone comes along, that rattles everything right down to the foundation of your family, and relationship. You might even push it away at first, but curiosity gets the better of us, almost every time.

Last but not least - PEOPLE cheat, because something is missing from the one who promised to be everything we needed. Men stop dating women, once we have them. Women become full time mommies before they have their first child. He is called the husband. The sex, the passion, all disappear over time, but the woman's sex drive doesn't. In fact, it goes up, and men's penis's start to go down, and stay down. But women won't leave or stray just because of that, they might talk shit about him to her BFF. But she won't cheat. They cheat, when the romance leaves and is forgotten. When they feel neglected and taken for granted. They cheat with the guy friend, who always listens, who plays the part she wishes the husband played.

Some women, well, they just cheat like guys do, because she could. Because the opportunity presented itself. I once interviewed a happily married woman, who had a great sex life, great husband and father. Yet, she felt she needed someone else when she got bored, to keep her marriage fresh and new. She was content, and felt strongly that her hubby would never find out, and as of today, he still hasn't.

I have slept with all three female examples. After me, they left their husbands and boyfriends...eventfully met someone else and are happy, and not cheating. Give someone happy, and they won't cheat. So, the idea of, once a cheater, always a cheater...created by angry women who hate the fact that someone they trusted, and loved...betrayed them. I cheated in high school...yet, my whole eight year relationship, I never cheated once. It's not a science.

In closing, what I come away with is this...people make mistakes, in people. Over age, over not really getting to know who they are with. Over not living a good single life, before they make a commitment. I know guys who cheated on the wife. Married a second time, and are as happy as they ever were in the first marriage. Same for women. Then there are those, who are just not meant to be tied down. And you know what, it took a few broken hearts to realize it. That's life. But I understand why some people need to believe cheaters will always be cheaters...But you can say the same thing to those ex-boyfriends who spent years with you, and never gave you a ring, but did so to the next girl, under a year. Bitterness...NAKED!!!

Basil Latorre
Dating Naked

Friday, November 20, 2009

The Proposition...One Night Role-Play

Dating Naked
Writer: Basil Latorre
Topic: Roleplay/Rape Fantasy

My time online, I have seen it all and just about heard it all. I have even been propositioned.

Most of the time, being propositioned for sex is a good thing if you are a single, horny guy on the prowl for no-string's attached girl-"friends." I mean, most men are, but some won't admit to that fact. Truth is, every single guy is up for that...with the right non-committal girl of course. They just don't make enough of those girls after college. After college, girls tend to start looking for the serious guy. Non-committal girls are the rarity, so when you find one...enjoy her, it won't happen a lot.

When I first signed up for Myspace... some time in 2004, early '05, I was friend-requested by this one girl who enjoyed reading my lame, boring old blogs I had just posted. This was before I figured out this blogging thing. Who am I kidding, I still haven't figured it out! But she liked it. This is where I learned Myspace was full of interested women looking for fun flirting...and of course, love. I was more interested in the fun and flirting. Love was a disease I wasn't interested in catching. I learned pretty fast that it was spreading-like Swine flu. Thank God I had the H1N1 vaccination called the recent ex-girlfriend to remind me I didn't want any part of that.

This girl wasn't looking for her next hit of love crack on Myspace...she was looking for her next hit of E, ME!!

It was all heavy flirting and innuendos from the start. That's how it always starts. You start out with small doses of flirting...where it leads to more intense, more in your face kind of flirting. Pretty soon, you are talking dirty and what you want to do to her, followed by her reply of filth and what she is going to do to you in return. It was great, she wanted love and a relationship about as much as I did. I thought it could be all smoke and mirrors, but the more we talked, I got the idea she just wanted to get it pounded and cum a lot. We did a little photo sharing...phone sex. She was really wild, with the pulling my hair stuff, push me around, but I didn't think anything of it, some girls like it that way. So, I told her I would grab the back of her neck, bend her over and finger her from behind...She loved it, the more aggressive I got, the more she got into it.

After awhile, I began to learn that she really wasn't, or couldn't be satisfied sexually. And like any guy, we all think we can be the one to give it, and give it to her good.

I know what you girls are thinking. Where have I heard that before?

What are we supposed to say though ladies?

No, you're right, probably can't fuck you retarded, let me hit it anyway? That's hot...but again, like all guys, I really did think I could. At this point in my life, I had already tried and been having sex long enough where I knew where I was king, and where I needed help. And let's face it, we all think we have the magic wand for a cock...hocus pocus, YOU have multiple orgasms. Abra cadabra - SQIURT!!!!

I might even be able to convince you I can pull a rabbit out, but that might also scare you. So I will stick with the orgasms.

She was into me, but she still didn't seem convinced, and I really wanted to fuck her now. Even just out of curiosity...what's the worst thing that could happen, I can't? I would just blame her, and go about my business, smirk. I mean that's what us guys do anyway to save face...we blame the vagina not being functional.

So one night, the conversation takes a wild twist. She finally gets curious enough to meet up, I mean we both live in NYC. She starts asking me questions about roleplay, and how aggressive I can be...I mean, what, she wants me to pull hair, throw her around. I got that. She wants a good sport fuck.

But no, for us to have sex, she wanted to know if I would rape her in some funky roleplay craziness. Now I have heard of rape fantasies. But not with an actual stranger. But it gets even more crazy, seems as if this is the only way she can get off...to be punched, surprised and then raped while she tries to fight back.

I said: Whoah Momma - What the fuck are you talking about?
She said: I want you to rape me and hurt me...punch me in the face and fuck me.
I said: Did we have issues as a kid...are you kidding, or just fucking crazy?
She said: Not crazy, I can't get off any other way.
I said: Ok, well, do YOU think I'M crazy, what makes you think I would ever agree to that?
She said: Well, you talk a good game, prove it.

I am imagining me in hand cuffs, crying as they take me away for rape...screaming, she wanted it, I swear.

I said: That takes serious trust...let me ask you, do you do this with everyone, since you can't get off?
She said: Sometimes I go out and do this...with strangers I meet at clubs. You would be surprised how many guys enjoy doing it.

I couldn't get past the idea of jail, and that I really didn't know this girl, or who she was, or was about. And most of all, punching her. Like I said, I can throw you around, on the bed...be forceful. Pull your hair while I control you. But actually punching her...Yikes. I took a pass on the idea of the worst possible outcome. And that was, that she said it wasn't consensual. I am not above playing out a rape fantasy, but that requires trust, and knowing your partner. And signing a letter of consent wouldn't hurt either, for that matter,or talking into a video camera that you agreed to it.

She promptly deleted me after calling me a pussy. I replied with a meow. This is one pussy that will never be behind bars...or wanted by the law, like Kobe Bryant. Kobe may have been guilty of cheating on his wife, but of rape...I seriously doubt it. Roleplay is and can be a lot of fun. But it's not something you can do with a stranger. People shouldn't be thought of as weird for their interests. I have a cousin Sebastian, who by day, is a hard working father of three. But by night...enjoys the fantasy of being a vampire, who goes by the name, Don Dante Della Morte. He likes being around other people who enjoy that culture. I am sure there is vampire fucking to go with it.

I did have one other roleplay reality experience...but that will come in a future reality blog.

So I have to ask, how do you feel about Rape roleplay fantasies?

Do you think she would have cried rape?

Basil LaTorre
Dating Naked.

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Wednesday, November 18, 2009

Just how FAR will You Go...Role Playing?

Well, now that depends...what are we talking about here? Are we talking about playing doctor and nurse, or dressing up as furry animals, and having a furry romp, midday in the park?

I have always thought role play was fun...I mean, it keeps a relationship fresh, while, never really having to go outside the commitment. Just discovering the filth inside the minds of our better halves can be a lot of fun...and might I add, arousing. On the other hand, it can also be an absolute mind fuck if it's something you really aren't into. "You wanna what, wear that...and do what again?"

I am pretty kinky for a 33 old white boy from Brooklyn, NY. I will pretty much try anything, as long as it doesn't make my rectum bleed or put me in drag. I will not be sporting a pretty butterfly thong, as much as some of you are giggling at that idea like third graders at the sound of an oops fart. I am however, up to play the part.

Just tell me what you need...what are we talking about?

How far are you willing to go for someone you love...that is the question. Would you rape someone you love, if they asked you to? That's role play. Would you dress up, and play a part? Would you go out in public, with someone you know everything about, and pretend you didn't know them, like you were cheating?

These examples are the new form of role play. The doctor, yeah..he is out. The school teacher...well, that's still in if you ask me. I always wanted to shtook my teacher.

If your husband wanted you to dress up, as a school girl, in a Catholic school girl's uniform, would you? Should you? Would you think he is secretly thinking about under-aged girls, still in high school?

Would you put on, a pink furry costume of a rabbit?

As much as that amuses me. I have to admit, I have stumbled upon some porn of people playing furries and fucking, and found it hard to look away. I also admit, if my girl came to me, and asked me to wear it, I might look at her funny, say out loud..."you're kidding...right?" But if I knew she was totally serious, as ashamed as I am to admit this, I would be online researching furry costumes.

I say that, because once you open that door, there is no closing it. Who wants to close a door, on something that they have been secretly fantasizing about for God knows how long?

Relationships are far too serious to begin with...it's why men wander. It's why women read books, instead of blowing their husband. Marriages tend to become the house of Mommy and Daddy, and we have to be these role models for our children. Next thing we know, we have become our parents. The parents you make faces at when you think of them getting a quickie and catching them in the act. To prove that, imagine Mom and Dad dressed as furries, getting it on in the park...behind some bushes.

Mind fucked ya, huh?

Some of you are thinking, well...I am not into that. I don't have to worry about that scenario. Me and my other half, are not into role play of any kind. But what if he or she was...but they never told you, until now?

I can tell you right now...behind every relationship, is a secret they have never told you. Don't believe me, ask your spouse in a way that encourages honesty, not hide it. Be open to whatever they might drop on your lap. They might want to spank you...S&M anyone?

Maybe it's one of those things I already mentioned...maybe they want to act like you guys just met, and meet for sex at a hotel on the sneak. Maybe they want to dress up as an adorable, cute, little freaky mouse. Maybe they want you to dress up as their favorite character from Star Wars...Like Han Swallows. What if your husband, like Zack and Miri Make a Porno, wants to make a porno of you two on his own? Just how kinky can you get for the love of your relationship? It might just end up being a catastrophic success.

For the record, I am not really sure if I could wear a furry. But it's open for conversation. But if I was, what furry should I be? It's open for comment, and debate...and STOP laughing...NAKED!!!

Basil La Torre

Monday, November 9, 2009

Quit Blaming the Sex Drives

It's not them, it's you...every couple wants to blame the sex drive, or lack thereof. But how's that helping anyone? Most of all, helping your need to get completely fucked stupid.

Now, now Basil, that's not very sensitive...I know that's what you are thinking. I would gather you are also thinking they probably need Dr. Phil, and a little understanding. I disagree. Sometimes, people need brutal honesty. And with this subject, brutal honesty has never been more important. Now, I have never been married, but I have been in a relationship longer than most marriages last these days.

My relationship lasted a little over eight years...and in that time, we had a few sexless stops along the way. But, it wasn't because I lost my sex drive, and she had one bigger than mine, or vice versa. Because let me tell you, there were plenty of women I would have been happy to fuck into a coma. And I am sure, there were plenty of guy's faces she would have loved to introduce to her vertical smile between her legs. But for whatever reason, we just weren't very into each other.

"Gee, Basil...what were those reasons?"

I hear ya...I said brutal honesty. It was any number of things. She changed her appearance. What appealed to me about her in the beginning, vanished without a trace. Years of silly arguments, over stupid things...also took its toll. Seeing all those little things that irritate you, that weren't so visible in the beginning, didn't help with sex either. The mystery was gone, I'm sure on both sides.

I am sure if you asked her, she probably has a list of any number of things about me. I am far from easy to live with. You add all that up, and who wants to have sex? But more than anything, after awhile, nothing is new anymore. There is nothing new you can bring to the table that keeps it interesting. I love me some eggplant samich, from John's Deli with an olive salad on the side. But if I had to eat it every fucking day, I would get sick of it. But with food, you get to try other things. In a relationship, unless you are a swinger, you don't get to try the girl at work for lunch...and the girl from that store you like to go to, because you know she is there.

She didn't get to taste Johnny Depp, who I know she would have cheated on me for, in a second. It wouldn't have shocked me if she screamed out, ohh, Johnny, during sex...I knew. In the beginning, when we weren't together, before we lived with each other, she used to masturbate to me...sometimes, we had phone sex. Or I would write these dirty, filthy notes to her, letting her know where my mind was at any given moment, and she loved it.

You might be thinking, well, why didn't you just write her some more of those filthy notes?

Because when I wrote them in the beginning, it was inspired...from the heart. Believe me, she brought that to my attention. She kept them, like a proud mother would of her baby photos of her kids. I knew what she was doing, she was reaching out...hinting that she wanted more of that. But it couldn't be asked for, because it wouldn't have been real, like the beginning. She didn't have to ask me in the beginning. I could have made some shit up, just to make her feel good, but how's that fair on my side?

Is that what it becomes...appeasing people?

If you asked me, I would have said, well..grow your hair out again...lose 20 pounds. Be new again, before I found out how you were really like to live with. Dress up again, take those stupid, ugly, over-sized sweaters off. Stop whining about every single thing...God, nothing hot about emotional females. Fuck, stop having drama at work, I don't care...it's not high school, not everyone has to like you. I don't want to go to your family's house, they suck...that's why you moved out so fast and moved in with me. You couldn't wait to get away from them. I'll stop there...I can imagine what you are all thinking.

Wow, thank God they are not together anymore.

Exactly...None of that inspires fucking, or sex. And none of it, has anything to do with sex drives. In saying all that, it wasn't the end of our sex lives together. Sure we still had our moments. But it was more of our way of relieving tension. Release sex. Sex, just to have sex. It wasn't love making, and it sure as hell wasn't romantic. After awhile, you just kind of do things, either for yourself...or as I said before, to appease them. Because we are supposed to. Relationship sex becomes masturbation. Meaning, instead of tugging in the shower, or when they are not home, you kind of just use each other...her vagina, is my hand..my penis...her toy. I mean, they are there, why not, right?

What does all this mean?

Well, it means the lack of sex...more times than not, means bigger problems in other areas, not lack of sex drive. Sex drive is the excuse, so we don't have to say what the real problems are. Sometimes it's all the reasons I wrote about above. Others could be any number of things; feelings for someone else, lust for someone else. Anyway you look at it...it's a warning sign the end is near.

Not if you ask the Dr. Phil's of the world, maybe not Phil himself, but therapists. They will have you believe you can save it. But what are they supposed to say, they want your money. I say this, because after awhile, we are not capable of change on the scales it would take to make things right. We all have that, "love me for who I am" attitude. Don't try to change me, "love me for me, damn it, or not at all." Then some Doctor tells you, "No, change." Justified or not, no one wants to change.

Oh sure, some of us will, because one side might want it more than the other. And unless you are a real, fucked-up case that needs some serious soul searching; the rest, just can't do it for long before resentment kicks in and rears its ugly head. Because, we all just want people to love us for us. Not for what their idea of how we should be, is. I was reading a message board topic, that read, "differing sex drives." And under read this:

"I want it twice a day! She would be happy to go a whole month without touching me." Does this sound familiar?

I thought right away, wow, who's she fucking...because women get hornier with age, not less. Or, how much does she despise looking at him...is he a fat bastard, or does he man-scape or even care? What's the problem there? I seriously doubt it's her drive. Put the guy she likes to masturbate to in the room, and we will see how much her sex drive is the problem. As a guy, I have plenty of women I can get it up for...as women out there, you all have a person who can get it twitching to the point you lose control.

And for those people, where it's really about the sex drive, or lack thereof, those are the people who never had it to begin with...for whatever reason. If you are with a guy or girl who used to fuck you like they couldn't get enough of you, and now, they can't stay far enough away from you. It's not the sex drive, it's YOU.

Basil LaTorre.

Friday, November 6, 2009

Just Ignore What She Says

Dating Naked
Writer: Basil Latorre
Topic: Casual sex
She wants casual sex too, it’s just not her first option...like any salesman, they will take less to get the sale, but if you are willing to pay higher, why lead on to that fact?

The idea behind dating casually, and pursuing someone whose first option is something more serious, is patience. If a woman likes you enough, and has a strong attraction to you, she will sleep with you. But she won't just come out and admit that fact, at least not to you. In the cat and mouse game that is dating...most women live by perceptions. The perception, that she isn't "that girl." Most guys, don't mind being "that guy," just as long as it doesn't hurt their game. So how do the two come together in happily unmarital bliss?

It’s simple, keep her occupied and listening. If you can hold her attention once she knows your intentions, your chances greatly increase. Remember, women are not robots. They want to get laid as much, if not more than you do. If you've ever had the pleasure of listening in on women talk about their sexuality, you will probably have a strong moment of clarity, right as you are done beating off...enjoying the aftermath of an orgasm. Women are silly horny. So the idea that single women, who are looking for that one true thing, will look past the really sure thing, is absurd.

Women are more discrete than men, and in no way, ever want to give a potential husband the idea that she is easy, and that any Tom, Dick and Basil, can get it, or has had it.

Again, it’s the perception factor. I have gotten to know women over the last five years, who I knew were very sexually active, yet told potential new men, that they can't have loveless sex. Meanwhile, they all had a regular guy or two. But in their defense, it’s not an even playing field when it comes to being promiscuous. Having sexual relations with a number of partners on a casual basis for men, is somewhat dirty to women. But, most women won't hold that against them, if, that is, she really likes him. But men, automatically put women in a category they can't climb out of. Most girls, don't want the Rob Dyrdek tag of, "dirty girl."
As a guy, you have to keep in mind, that most girls...hate sleeping alone, I mean HATE it. Not all, there are those who can't wait to kick you out once they are done with you. But more than not, women just hate being alone-period.

So if her potential relationship-well is all dried up, she is going to want something to keep it wet and flowing. That's where you come in, whether she likes it or not. Sometimes, it just happens on its own, with no preparation, or planning behind it. Sometimes, it’s all about being at the right place, at the right time. The rest of the time, it just wasn't going to happen, regardless. Call it sexual fate. Put two people together for a certain amount of time, and chemistry takes over. You just can't be so quick to write her off at the first sign of her being a commitment needy female.

If you do work your way in, remember...women get attached pretty quickly. It’s a rarity they can pull off a healthy sexual relationship. Three or more times and it just starts to happen. Familiarity and comfort just set in...and the next thing you know, it resembles a relationship. If you are lucky enough to get in, be fair in not allowing yourself to give her the comforts of a commitment. Don't become jealous of other things she might be doing...in turn, mind your business. If you start showing jealousy, she will confuse that as you wanting more. And not what it really is.

If you do end up falling for her, make sure you have that conversation...so that she can allow herself to fall with you, or walk away, because that’s just not what it is anymore. You wanted casual, and now...that's what it is for her.

In the same breath, don't treat her like a vagina on the clock. Go out, act as if. Just keep feelings of anything more than a friendship, out of it...Naked!!
Basil LaTorre

Monday, November 2, 2009

Don't ASK, Don't TELL

Dating Naked
Guest Writer: Felicia.
Topic: The Open Relationship

Awe, the open relationship. I prefer to call it the "don't ask, don't tell" policy... call it what you will... it all boils down to the same thing.

I, like most, have spent plenty of time kissing frogs. I've gone from nerdy, straight-laced book worm types to bad-ass, shit-talking, good-for-nothing-but sex guys. And probably some of their girlfriends as well. So after several years of playing trial and error, this was the perfect alternative for me.
I happen to be a person that is very easily bored. Now I'm not saying that one day I think you're great and the next I don't. All I'm saying is that today you entertain me...tomorrow? Umm, maybe not so much. On top of that, I'm very easily distracted. The combination of the two can often be a little much for some people to handle.

Basil says I have a hard core case of relationship ADD. He thinks if I were medicated that things would be different.

Truth is, he's just saying that because he wants to try and take advantage. Yeah, I called you out...love you back, brat. In my life, I've been referred to as a many number of things. Some say I am a bitch. Others say I'm cold-blooded. I've heard insensitive, selfish, self-absorbed, self-centered; all of which may very well be true. Hell, who am I kidding... I'd be lying if I said otherwise. The only thing I can say to justify my actions, is what you see is what you get. I put my thoughts out there, and you can take it for what it is. There are no secrets. No hidden agendas. Never been the girl with the ulterior motive.

To be honest, I tend to hear these statements after I'm done and on to the next one. It's usually the 11th message, and they're still not over it. Ok, maybe it IS a little my fault. Sometimes I'm not so hot in the call back department. But I gotta tell ya, I got the point after they've left the 5th. Usually, by that point, there isn't much to be said to change my mind. Guess you can add stubborn to my list of attractive qualities as well. In any case, name calling isn't going to get it done for them. If anything, it's just another thing to bring laughter to my day. And yes, I do laugh often.

Going to throw this out there, in case you're a sensitive person. Probably not the right thing for you to get into. Some people resort to crazy things in regards to matters of their bruised egos. So don't be surprised how quickly people change.

Luckily for me, I am all of these things and probably more, so it doesn't affect me in the least.

The only downfall with the open relationship is that some people go into it thinking that this is what they really want. Or do they? Often I feel these people think they can change you. They put their best face forward and introduce you to the person they think you want them to be. Something like an interview. Always love it when you wake up one day and the representative is gone...leaving you to deal with the real monster they've become...or tried to disguise, I should say.

It's always funny to me, because I make it pretty clear what I want from the jump. This is what it is, and this is what it's not. Although they may get that awkward look as if they are temporarily stunned, it's always better to leave little room for confusion. You'd be surprised how many people look smarter than they really are.

So naturally you come across the few people who think they're super slick. They think they can tell you what you want to hear. They think that since you don't constantly reiterate what they already know, that maybe your feelings have changed? Then, once they think they're in there, they totally flip the script. As if you were faking the funk, just as they were. Again, umm, not really. That's usually the moment when you're staring at my ass...bolting for the door.
Honestly, the open relationship can be such a beautiful thing if both people know where they are in life, as well as where they are going. It really works if you can welcome it with open arms and open eyes.

See it for what it is and leave well enough alone.

It's very similar to a relationship in that you get all the perks. You go out, you have fun. You have a companion to share all the things you enjoy in life, as well as someone who knows your likes and dislikes.

Only difference is, is that anything goes. It's perfectly acceptable to go out and flirt with someone else. Hell, you can even take that person home. It allows you to give in to all your sluttastic urges while keeping a safety net around in the event that you're unable to hook up with anyone hotter.
Some have yet to realize the difference between holding a hand and chaining a soul. When you're younger, you don't know anything other than the path you're lead to believe is right. After a while, you see that everything is not always what you're told. Sometimes you need to form your own opinion instead of believing everything you hear. You find there's a difference in company and security. There's a difference in loving and leaning. Kisses and promises...not the same thing.

An open relationship means you don't have any rights over that other party. It takes a person that understands that love doesn't mean possession. Ideally they will be fully honest with each other (unlike most typical relationships). They don't get pissed at each other over minuscule things. In fact they will just like each other for who they are and support each other through times of need. There is no responsibility, hence there is nothing to fight about. Similar too, but not the same as polygamy. Just in having the ability to have more than one sexual/loving relationship at a time. Everyone has full knowledge and consent of the actions of the other person involved.

It seems to me as though we're always governed by love, when if anything, we should be subservient to desire. I am a person that knows what she wants...and usually gets just that. And I gotta tell ya, I'm one happy bitch. I don't know how many people are in situations that they are not happy with, but stuck in this comfort zone they have created. Yes, you have what you thought you once wanted...but do you still want it now? Are you sure?

Personally, I believe that half of us are immersed in sin. And what is a sin really? I know you guys know...that's why you read this smut. So just in case you DON'T know, a sin is a deliberate violation of any sort of moral or religious rule/law. Now I'm not a religious person...or always moral for that matter...but I'm guessing that my way of living, isn't the ideal way society would like to see a girl in her 20's, like myself.

Hey – ya know what? To each his own. Maybe more people should be real to their feelings and act it. Whether it be this or something else, everyone always has an opinion. Funny, because I don't recall asking for it, right?

All joking aside...Mahatma Gandhi once said, "We must be the change we wish to see in the world."

Take it for what it's worth...Felicia, Naked for a day.

Tomorrow, the male side of this topic. My rebuttal.

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

Oral Sex...She'd Rather Not?

Is giving head, dead. Do they still make this time machine...and how do we turn them from time machine, to a Hoover vac, for our pleasure?

A few years ago, one of my writers wrote a blog called "Oral Fixation" that opened up the door to the topic like never before. While there are certainly women who love giving it, it also opened the debate to women who don't. It doesn't matter what new positions you and your lover find during sex, with some women...the idea of oral sex is nauseating. I myself have had the “No thanks!” run-in a few times. It leaves you looking down at your junk, thinking...what did it ever do to you?

I have even had one girl tell me she would lick it, but wouldn't put it in her mouth. I thought to myself, lick it? What is it, a charms blow pop...baby, there is no gum. She said, "I don't want it in my mouth, or anyone's for that matter, don't take it personally." I replied, “I have to, I think my penis is going to need therapy after this.”

Talk about rejected; so I let her do her version of a blowjob, while it wasn't the worst of things, it left me yearning for the full mouthy.

One of the many reasons women are turned off by the idea of giving a blow job, comes from a taught belief that oral sex is impure, dirty and even disgusting, spawned by religious-minded parents. Others come from really bad experiences with previous partners who criticized their performance. After reading a comment on the blog "Oral Fixation" by a reader named Danielle...I thought about other reasons women detest the idea of oral sex...And I totally feel for them.

This is just some of what she said:
"I am not the biggest fan of blow jobs. It’s not that I hate them...I am " boycotting". First of all, I really have probably the worst gag reflex in the world!! I gag brushing my teeth for God sakes. I am down to do it when it’s clean. I would not expect my husband to go down on me after sweating all day, so why should he expect me to? Secondly, a trim is only a cleanup if it actually makes a difference...I wouldn't expect my husband to find his way through a bush...and I make the adjustments ;) "

I sympathize, I do, a gag reflex is a gag reflex...But the trimming part. Hey...a little manscaping is very important in this day and age. Guys have slowly gotten past the idea, that yes...men can trim and shape too. So what, they call you "metro-sexual." GET OVER IT! It looks good, it’s clean. It even gives you the illusion of more shaft. Yes, it was always there, but at first glance, a few of those inches were covered by a giant man bush.

You wanted inches? You got inches...Just trim a foot off the edges and voila...it's a penis makeover.

But, one of the main reasons women aren't too excited about giving men oral pleasure is because they feel that they don't have the skills to properly please their man. I have heard more women, be kind of intimidated by my sexual past...feeling they wouldn't be as good as others might have been. So, they don't do it at all.

Also, I was talking to a past writer not too long ago about the complex women have about blowjobs. It is the belief that men take longer to reach their climax through oral sex as compared to sexual intercourse. For this reason, some women take offense and feel that if they cannot properly please their man, they would prefer not to do it at all.

1: We all have a past, and while some of our sexual experiences were better than others, that should never make one not want to do something, don't matter what it is. In all honesty, it should make you work that much harder, to be that much better. I know I would. I can't expect to start out being the best she’s ever had, but I, for damn sure, will learn how to be.

2: Yes, for some strange reason, entering a woman makes you want to orgasm, right there and then. I never really understood that. Maybe it’s because we are not doing any of the work...maybe it’s just a small difference in sensation. It for sure doesn't mean you are doing it wrong...if you want the truth, when you are getting bad head, we want it over with, even before we reach climax. If we are taking longer, it’s probably because it feels amazing, and we don't want it to stop.

Danielle also stated in that comment, that she hated the taste of sperm. And, really, as a guy, I don't blame her...more times than not, after watching a girl take a mouthful, I often wondered how the hell she did that with out hurling on my lap. I really do sympathize. But women have tricks where they don’t even taste it, when it goes down with one swallow...my heroes! But in talking taste, let’s not forget that women don't taste like cherry Kool-Aid...yet, I would never use that excuse. You women have far more going on down there than any guy at any time. The truth is, I get lost in the giving so much so, I never think about it.

3: Blowjobs should never be used as a reward once a month. To go along with Danielle's comment, there was also a reader who admitted that she also didn't like it, but did it for her husband once a month, as a treat for being good.

A TREAT, WTF is that? Maybe he deserves being treated like a child. But whatever happened to spontaneity in the relationship? Where is the foreplay, and the idea that anything, can and will happen? So what happens if he had his “once a month” treat the night before, and you are fooling around the next day, does that mean his penis is off limits to your mouth? To me, that is what's wrong with marriage...things change. People don't make out, sex is a chore because it’s your duty to please your man, and not that you can't help but want to please him, and be pleasured back. This is why men wander off, because they want that raw, unexpected in-the-moment rush that comes when the lust gets the better of you.

If she were my wife, she would get one conversation, about how that makes me feel. If it went ignored, or overlooked or if it turned into a fight, divorce papers would be next, on the grounds of false advertisement. I want what we had when we first got together. No exceptions. And if that was what he married, and she was always like that...you get what you paid for. Never take less than what you are worth.

So, a little recap, what did we learn here?

Smooth Landing: Give a her a smooth landing to land on...Shave that brillo pad. If she wanted to swallow some, she would run in the kitchen and get a fresh one out from under the sink. It’s almost 2010, The Sasquatch look went out with The Seventies, with polyester shirts, and bell-bottoms. Remember, manscape...if you expect them to, you better keep up in the right areas.

Be Sensitive: Women are not the only ones who should speak up in the bedroom, but for Christ sakes guys...ease up! You sound like a father scolding his kid. Lighten up and remember she might not understand the male penis like we don’t know their genitalia. Take your time and explain that some of what she heard through "Rumors" about men loving teeth is not always true with you. I myself cannot stand teeth chewing on my mini-me. But ladies, close your eyes and imagine your guy wrapping his teeth around one of your lips, and scraping them across it...yeah, OUCH!

Oral foreplay: You don't always have to jump right into the act. Oral foreplay can make going down on your guy even more enjoyable than you can imagine. Use flavored lubes, or honey...whatever you like. It can open some serious doors into some wild nights.

She Cums First: Never underestimate the power of a mind-blowing orgasm, especially the feeling of your lips against her clit. This is a first kiss that will literally take her breath away, and open that door that is her mouth to your penis. Make her cum hard. She will be more than willing to help you out.

So, I know this is a subject that some of you are not willing to talk about in public...You never know who else is reading, or you are just shy. But for those who will, leave some comments.

What do you think about the married woman who only performs once a month as a treat?

Does oral sex turn you off, and why? Is giving head, dead?

Basil...Dating Naked.

Monday, October 12, 2009

Naked Tips...Getting the Most out of Being Single

And doing single well...because let’s be frank, most of you don't do it well at all.

Watching men and women being single these days is painful to watch. I think it’s even painful for them to go through it. But that's where I become confused. Being single gets a bad rap in my opinion; I mean, it allows you to open new doors, try new things. Maybe it’s just me, but I am a curious person, I like opening new doors...and love trying new things. To me, there is nothing more exciting than the unknown. Being single offers us a world of opportunity. You just have to know where to find it.

I have read articles from Men's Health to Forbes magazine discussing the five best cities to meet men and women. First of all, you can meet people in any city, any place around the world. There is no such thing as one city being better than another. Now if you are living in a city of 3000 people, your chances of meeting someone drastically changes...kind of common sense. Small town America is famous for high school sweethearts, but that's also because there are less fish in the pond. Dating sites are all the rage. And while they are viable, they have flaws.

1: They will never accurately tell you anything. Does anyone list his or her flaws? Do those sites even ask people that? Do they ask you if you have ever cheated on someone, and if they did, would you admit it? Does anyone put down the questions like...”Are you a good conversationalist?” Eight out of ten times, you are viewing the representative, what they think they are, or wish they were.

What they are good for is...they allow you to pick who was the hottest; because if you pass the eye candy test, it really doesn't matter what your profile says...someone will give you a chance.

If you are single, it won't hurt to sign up for one, not two or three, of those sites like eHarmony, or Match. They are the reputable sites. I will say, avoid anything free...because that's where you will find the bottom feeders mixed in with the good ones. The real douche bags who don't like to pay for anything. They complain that they have to pay for your drinks...pay for dinner. God forbid they had to pay for one of those dating sites. You will find them all over Myspace...number one breeding ground for douche nation. Facebook is another, although it’s not as bad as Myspace. And they are there because it’s booty pickings for smart players. Guys will be any place girls are, that is a fact you need to recognize. The easier, the better…that should be your first rule if you want a serious man or woman. If it is free, beware!

2: To go along with your account on one of the reputable sites, go out and try speed dating. Go out with one if not all of your girlfriends or best Bro-friends. There are so many new ways to meet people these days. Why not make a night of it just for fun. What’s the worst that could happen? Meeting in person allows you to avoid wasting time. With people, there are just some things you can't hide, but you can easily pick up on in person. I always say, especially with girls, they just know. They know if they won't like you, if they will sleep with you...whether or not they will enjoy getting to know you. When they get a bad vibe, baby...pack it up, it’s over.

One of the biggest issues with single women that makes being single miserable is they wait for men to talk to them, rather than approaching the men. It’s the biggest misconception that you come off looking desperate. Most, if not all guys are afraid of rejection, and coming off looking desperate just isn’t appealing. But in the same breath, women are sick of men approaching them with their cheesy unoriginal lines.

So how does one solve that problem, without coming off too desperate?

A: Guys don't care if you approach them; in fact, it makes it easier if you did. But be honest ladies, how many men do you spot in the course a day while out with your friends, but never approach? He had no ring on his finger...and you didn't even say hi? Honestly think about that... how many attractive men do you see every single day, who don't know you are interested in them?

I understand that some of those guys you approach will turn out to be married, gay or just jerks. But, you must believe a few of them might just be someone of interest that will live up to the billing. But you wouldn't know that because you most likely will never see them again. Why, because you didn't woman up and introduce yourself!

B: You have to be willing to date, like go out on an actual date. That means don't give them your Myspace, and don't spend hours talking to them on the phone until after you had at least one good first date. Lunch dates are best...especially if you have a job, or career. Think about that, you could actually have a week of five dates with men getting to know them...and by the end of the week you might have one great weekend date with the one guy that impressed you better than the rest. What's the worst that could happen? They are all duds, and you have a weekend out with the ladies. That just means a new week of phone numbers and new dates. Another perk about the lunch date...if it’s really bad, hey, you have to be back at work in an hour…right? Lol!

My advice: Don't put all your eggs in one basket. Your chances of finding the right guy greatly increases the more men you meet, just like anything else in life. You might even meet a few good friends...date quantity, and pick quality.

If you have questions...I have answers. If I don't, I will make it up as I go.

Sunday, October 11, 2009

Was It Really That Bad, Or Was it Just Me?

Ok, so the dating scene is not going as smoothly as you thought it was going to be.

The last guy turned out to be a jerk after you had sex with him, and this other guy/girl won't stop calling after one bad date. Now you’re starting to second-guess breaking up with your last relationship. Grass isn't always greener, is it?

I could have told you that, but who asked me. It doesn't always happen as fast as you would like! That's always a fact. Nothing good ever comes easily...or quickly. If it seemed too easy, it probably was. You are not the exception, the exception being the rule. If you were, you wouldn't be thinking about that ex. You see, he wasn't perfect, but he was always there. It’s easy to remember the comfort of the relationship. It’s even easier to forget why we broke up in the first place. The pull to pick up the phone is a drug, and it’s not easy to shake. Sometimes we just want what's familiar.

It’s like a comfort food you have not had in awhile; you just know it’s going to be good...even if it won't help your diet.

It’s even funnier how they know when to call when you are at your most vulnerable point. Like they have some kind of spy in your brain, telling them, "CALL, she is miserable." Weird Jedi mind tricks we play on ourselves.

A sign from above: You were thinking about old times, the best times. Looking at old photos...it must be a sign that he called...Right? Wrong, it’s really not...you are just looking for a sign. Loneliness is a bitch of a feeling. Loneliness is a feeling where people experience a powerful surge of emptiness. In that emptiness, we reach for things to fill that void. It makes you call a friend, just to see if they are going to tell you what you want to hear. Tell you that yes, what you are thinking is true, Confirmation. The truth of the matter is, he probably has been thinking about you from the point of the break up. Maybe because he misses you, or maybe even because you ended it, and not on "his" terms. Maybe because he has an ego, and didn't like being dumped, and told it’s not going to work. Most of all, he of all people, will know just what to say.

Of course he will, he spent a good chunk of time with you, and knows just what it is you need to hear... It’s not at all that they changed and have figured out what they did wrong the first time. No, it’s that they can manipulate your weakness of being lonely. "You know, kind of how they kept you in that relationship longer than you wanted to be in it in the first place. "Manipulation," is the way most people get what they want, even when it is not really what you wanted.

The ex is guilty of this just as much as a player trying to get in your pants. They, like the player, will say and do whatever it’s going to take to get that end result.

Sex with an Ex...aka comfort sex: Like a comfort food, comfort sex is the familiar touch of someone who put in the time. He may not even be the best sex, but it was that relationship sex you have been missing. The problem is, there is no way a stranger can give you that feeling you desire. Yeah, he might be able to fuck, and fuck well...you might have cum more times in one night with this stranger than you did your whole relationship...but we all know what the truth really is. Most girls will take emotional in-love sex over that great fuck. I know some of you ladies are reading this talking to yourselves saying,
"BULLSHIT, I want the fucking and the orgasms!"

But more than not, you want that emotional connection only a relationship can give you. We all know when that guy is inside you, and he is looking so deep into your eyes, you think you can see inside of his heart, and it’s beating just for you. But you are only remembering the beginning, and not the middle and the end.

The beginning is the best part of everything new. If that feeling came in a food, or candy bar, you girls would all be pretty fat, and watching infomercials waiting for that next new gadget sure to knock the pounds right off...right? It doesn't and chocolate will only last so long.

So, you sit there mind-fucking yourself asking: "Was it really that bad, or was it you being selfish?" Maybe it was both...maybe the beginning was like any other great beginning. But he or she couldn't sustain it. But, never lose sight of the things that made you feel neglected, or the selfish habits they couldn't change that made you want to get on a plane and never come back. The relationship came to an end for a reason, and it’s your job to see if it was really them, or maybe it was you.

In the movie The Break Up...It ended with Vince Vaughn and Jennifer Aniston running into each other, and everything seemed all clean and fresh. He had learned something, and lost some relationship pounds. And she had traveled and done the things her relationship held her back from doing. It ends with the possibility of something...but doesn't elaborate.

That's us...sometimes you have to leave something and leave it in the past, to have something better than before. You can't EVER go back to something thinking it wasn't really that bad. That's fools gold.

You want the past, you will get the past...and all the bullshit that came with it. Make sure you know that if you do get that pull, that you have moved on from the past, and start all over from go. They have to earn your time, not get it because nothing else better came along. I know the theory is, “I’d rather be unhappy and not alone, than unhappy and alone.” How about we just work on being happy, the rest will follow...NAKED!

Basil...Dating Naked

Tuesday, October 6, 2009

The Prerequisite for a Relationship

One of my readers once asked me, "What do YOU WANT?"

I was taken back for a second, I never really had anyone ask me before, or did I ever really think about it. I mean, there are the obvious things we think we want. I sat back for a second, and actually thought about what it is I really want. I mean of course down the line I want a relationship and be happy, a family. All the simple answers people give. But it’s not as simple of an answer. It's pretty complicated when you REALLY think about it. And, I am a complicated mystery. So I guess the simple answer just wouldn't work.

My answer was, "I am in the wind." A mafia term for former gangsters who have turned. Gone into the witness protection. They left and are now living "in the wind." Well, that's not what I meant. I took that term...and used it for my own use.

The Basil-pedia term means: I am not looking...but letting her find me.

But I do have the Prerequisites for a Relationship. Very important qualities to even get a foot in the door. But more importantly, do I have the prerequisites myself to be in a relationship? It’s easy to be concerned about what you want, and how you want it...but not too easy to know you want something, yet say, I am not ready myself, what do I...offer them?

How much baggage do I carry around every single day...what's in my attic, what’s in my basement? A lot of you carry around so much weight, it’s almost unfair to bring someone into the mess we never cleaned up, but swept under the rug so that it looked good to the blind eye. We are all guilty of this, including me.

"Problems, what problems?"

I know I expect someone else to do it for me, so it’s important we do it for him or her. To work out that stuff, come in knowing what it is they want, and make sure I am all those things and more. The one thing I don't do is look. To me, looking equals failure. Of course I make myself accessible. I have tried dating sites, putting myself out there. In fact, I have tried it all. It’s my job as the Dating Naked columnist. But I don't join these sites thinking, it has to be for love. I'm not looking for love, yet letting love happen on its own. To me, it comes off looking desperate. Now before you kill me...you lookers out there, I simply mean dating sites are just tools to increase our chances to meet people we might never meet. People who might just turn into the real thing. I once said in this very article, the original...that, "I am not afraid of being alone."

But that was a lie, I am terrified of it! Terrified that I will die alone, never having that very thing we all strive for. But in that, I still won't tie myself into the wrong thing, at the wrong time. That just makes me want to work that much harder on myself. I can tell you, I have lost a few great chances at relationships over the last few years because I didn't have the prerequisites to be in one, or even entertain one. And believe me, I wanted to grab onto it for all I was worth. There are A LOT of people who just can't help but hate that they don't have that someone, right that second in time. And they have that “For Sale” sign hanging around their necks.

And let’s be totally honest. It’s a bad market out there right now.

What that leads to is, allowing your expectations to be lowered...therefore allowing the wrong people in. Stopping other possibilities...”better fits” to pass you by. What do you expect when you take your house off the market. People don't stop to look at you. Serious buyers, that is.

So what are my prerequisites that I look for in a person?

1: Has to be outgoing. This is so very, very important. I like when someone can see something they want, and doesn't hold back. Can crack a joke and laugh at herself. Likes other people and likes to socialize. The last thing I want is someone who hates people, and likes to stay in all the time.

2: Has to be loyal...I can't stress that enough. I need a soul that wants and will protect mine for all they are worth. Who at times can be a pitbull when it comes time to have my back on something. Just like she would want me to do. To be family...to get that close to be my life. Betrayal must never be an option. I see all this distrust in relationships...and the stress. That’s for the birds. I need to know when you say something...I can trust it without question or doubt. And I want to give that trust.

3: No ex-relationship baggage. Hey, I know we all have it, don't get me wrong. I have baggage, had baggage before that baggage. My attic was a clutter fuck of baggage...I have had to sort through it, and get rid of the things holding me back. I had to; it was no easy task. You never move on to the next unsuspecting bastard, bags in hand and dump it on him or her. Your next relationship isn't your therapist's office.

4: Has to have a good education and foundation of her own. Never, and I mean never, get involved with someone who is just starting their higher education. Someone who works hard, will respect that you work hard. They will respect their spending. Although I might be a bit of a hypocrite since I go through money like water. But in that, it makes me want to work that much harder making money. I simply like that someone has a passion for something, and they are doing it. Ambition...I don't care what it is. How small or how big. Someone who has their own will respect and love mine.

5: Has to love animals. I have two boxer dogs...Capone and Honey; they are like family to me, my kids in many ways. But it goes beyond that. Someone who has compassion for animals, is a deep human being. Now, I am not talking PETA here. I won't be giving up steak any time soon, or start throwing paint on people who wear fur. But just someone who shares my love for the four-legged creatures of the world. My love runs deep; I am a sucker for all animals. While I looked into boxer rescues, before I got Honey, I was horrified by the cruel things people did to these animals, so much so it made me cry. I know my future will have me involved with helping these animals in some sort of way. Puppy mills need to be shut down and pet stores need to change their involvement with mills.

6: Has to love food...it's a passion of mine. Not just eating it, but creating it. I love cooking. I love all kinds of ethnic foods from all over the world. I plan on cooking all the time. BBQ's are going to be a Sunday thing. Christmas is going to be a feast of the seven fishes. Anniversaries will be amazing. I love family - Yours and mine. Or...I hope yours. Yikes...hahaha

7: Family, I want a nice, big family. So if one kid is all you have in mind…hey, I will have drinks with you, maybe sexual relations. Become friends...but I plan on preserving my family and planting my roots. I see two maybe three in my future...four if I make the serious cash-eesh. You see I lost my Mom in a fire. Never met my father. And a lot of my family moved away or doesn't want to be part of the family. This is important to me. My kids are not even born yet...and I already love them. So I hope she loves the idea of family.

I’ll stop there, seven is a lucky number for me...Just hope that means I won't be married six times before I get it right. <-- Knocks on wood

But there are so many things...being able to have fun, likes sports. Wouldn't mind going to a UFC mixed Martial Arts fight. Could sit there and watch Monday Night Raw with me. Likes to go on drives. Loves the beach, boardwalks. Has a deviant side, and can get a little wild. They are important, but not as important as the prerequisite-seven list. Remember though, it’s not always what they can do for you, it’s what you can do for them as well...going out strong with my JFK reference...Naked.

What’s your Prerequisite list?

Do you think you have all the Prerequisites to even be in a relationship? Leave a comment and let us know.

Basil...Dating Naked

Rings LOVE Me!!

By Basil LaTorre
Dating Naked -
Topic: Infidelity

Single or committed...I have had incredibly good luck with married women of all ages. I never put much thought into it, I just went with it. And why not? My sex life was always an education or even practice for the real thing one day. Now before you get all judgmental - I understand that we all live by a set of rules. But no, really, it's YOU who lives by a set of rules. The single, unattached male or female is in it for themselves. If I am not looking for anything serious, "What other options are there?"

I also can hear you saying, "Why don't they just put that same energy into single women?"

You want the truth..."Single people are more complicated."

I will explain: Single people are harder to approach, because they are so on guard of the potential player sneaking in the back door, that they forget to enjoy themselves. First dates are more like job interviews. Young, single people are still wet behind the ears, and are in search of nothing but the relationship. So much so that they can't see anything but. If you are not relationship ready for some people, they discard you as a player...and move on.

The married woman is not delusional any more, they've been through the wars. They know what's missing, and want what was given in the beginning. We all love the beginning. Let's just be honest. Next to your kids being born, it's the best part of the relationship. Imagine being locked away from the outside world, with little or no sex life for a few years. No conversation...and the only attention you get, is when they ask what's for dinner. Mind you, those few years seem even longer in your boredom, waiting for the man or woman you first met and fell in love with, to come walking in the door. People can be patient, but sooner or later they will snap and search for that rush which causes that blood flow that makes you feel ten years younger. It's easy for you to lable them as whores, or sluts...or bastards. But really, they are just human.

I always compare it to the house cat...looking out the window at a world they want to be part of.
Ever watch them?

They move and jump at what's going on...totally into anything from a bag caught in the wind, or a bird prancing around asking to be eaten - if it could only get past that glass. The glass is one big, huge cock-block from a world they can only watch. That's the bored house wife, or neglected husband or boyfriend. Or, someone who jumped, thinking that being in a relationship was what they were supposed to do.

Let's face it...we are controlled by a world that tells us this is what we are supposed to do. Only there is no crash-course test drive. Even though we read and watch how bad it can be...we always believe that we know just enough so that will be avoided.

Then, here comes a guy or girl who's completely into you. You don't even care why. You just feel wanted. Your better sense will flirt and play, but it won't jump. But we were given this thing called curiousity. For better or worse, we have it. And curiousity will get the better of our senses sooner or later. We all do what feels good. How many of you out there have that one secret that felt really good doing it, wrong or right? Some of you lock it away forever, and others use it as a guide to get out and get what it is that you deserve.

So, why do the rings LOVE me?

Because I pay attention...I put all of my energy into getting to know them. Something as simple as wanting to know things about them, can get you far. Because of how I approach. I make women feel wanted. Something lost in a sour relationship. Because of how I flirt, and make them laugh. How I can make them feel like the center of the universe. I am not rushing to get into her pants as much as I am building up to that moment. I create loads and loads of anticipation. Simply, I send her home thinking. Thinking of a better tomorrow, that she is worth it. No one should ever settle on less than what they are worth...and I make married women value their worth. Even if I don't sleep with them. I make them remember what is great about dating and relationships. Before it became constant tension when he walks in a room, you feel overwhelmed with all kind of emotions...but not in a good way.

As I have said before...I am not an advocate of bad relationships. If I could, I would destroy them all.

I don't claim right or wrong...but married or not, if you approach me like that in the moment, your ring means little or nothing to me. I might warn you once about what you are getting into. After that, you are adult enough to make your own choices, and be accountable for your own actions. I didn't say 'I do'...You did. It's your reputation-your family. A good and happy relationship, is one I could never touch. Guys like me only get to relationships that are already broken...I just happen to be a small crack in an already bad foundation.

If you are judgmental...and want to ask me, "What if my wife did that to me?"

Well you know what? I guess I dropped the ball, or picked the wrong woman. I will swallow my bitter little pill...and know that there is life after infidelity. In truth, she set me free for that relationship I deserve. And yes, there are men and women out there who aren't dropping the ball...who are giving that attention. Who are good parents and being cheated on for something as selfish as wanting to keep the marriage fresh. Double lives. I have had her too, even wrote an advice blog about it once. She is part of the contradiction that exists in our society today. I don't make excuses for her. Truth, I can't even understand her.

The one thing I do feel is...I give someone the confidence to get out of a shitty situation. Excuse me, but that's a public service. Married women didn't come to me because they are happy in their lives, are they?

In closing, you might feel I am just manipulating a bad situation for my own selfish wants and needs. And, in your mind, you are right. In my mind, I am the wrecking ball of single behavior. Life is too short for me to look past the potential in front of me. When I look back, I will have no regrets. My single life is mine, and will not be lost on rules and moral judgments. I respect and love those beautiful relationships, and hope to have one of my own one day.

Topic of discussion: Is it the responsibility of the single guy, or the married woman to honor the marriage...or maybe both?

Or, you can just leave a rant - however you feel inspired. This is not just a blog, this is reality happening as we speak. Somewhere, some place, someone is thinking it, about to do it, or doing it. Leave your NAKED comment.

Basil...Dating Naked